Thursday, June 18, 2009

irrelevant thoughts

i am picking up the pieces right now, remnants of the mental tantrum of days past. i need to throw things out. there's no point in keeping memories of times i never had the right to keep in the first place.

i feel so stupid right now, far more overwhelming than the feeling of being broken.

i am left with nothing, i realized, and my world feels like the rug got snatched under my feet. what's weird about it all is that i already knew it was going to be happen and yet, could not prepare for it.

i can't say the pleasure is all mine in response to your dutiful gratitude for i don't feel anything right now to be honest. i do hope that i will and will genuinely wish you the best when the time comes and all is right.

for now however, pardon me for keeping my wishes. i think i have given you more than enough.

the Lord is kind. even if it means beating the hell out of you for being foolish and stubborn.


Theo Martin said...

polar bear, you deserve to feel down from time to time. in any case, for people who are super intelligent like you and who tend to get lost in your thoughts/imagination, whether productive or destructive, you must learn the art of control. its' all in the mind. dont let it control you. parang hay paano ba, just busy yourself. sorry i feel so naive giving you advice, but i just hope this finds you well! :-)

jamie da vinci! said...

@theo. thank you very much. true, idleness can be evil.

i'm a narnian said...


time does not wait.

funny nung word verif: cekrit!