Monday, February 28, 2011
i closed my eyes to see it more clearly. i closed my eyes to make things disappear, maybe robbing myself of other stimulations, concentrating the focus even more to that singular point wherein everything mattered and all things else became unimportant. it was the heart beat. it was the pulse throbbing in my jaw, my shoulder, my throat, in my head. it was being lost in the thick darkness of not seeing and yet seeing splashes of acid yellow and toxic green, of bubbles floating about as my eyes saccaded under my eyelids, my brain hallucinating now. it was my muscles slowly growing limp, its tonicity wasting, my body eventually slacking, visualizing atrophy. it was hearing that honest speaking again, as i surrendered myself, defenseless, and had finally allowed the world to take down veils and walls and layers of thick covering, revealing my frail nakedness, exposing my thin, sullen skin, barely clinging onto my small brittle bones, holding on to keep my broken, broken soul.