i remember

it starts with fragments of memory, minute slivers of time gone by. they swim in your head, like newly hatched tadpoles in a summer pool. you collect them, try to arrange them again in chronological order or maybe, according to level of significance. some pieces you find lead on to more pieces. others on the other hand, well, you wonder why they're even there. to the ones you deemed special, you begin to string together, taking well note of the blanks that space in between. you try to fill in the lapses and bring sense to the sequence. soon, a story unfolds again, like an old home-made movie, slightly hazy, with all the edges softened, probably after years of bumping about while floating in your brain. you view it through your mind's eye, reconnecting with the flashing images, studying again the old faces, the familiar places, the disembodied voices... then the emotions creep in. emotions make it all real again. it grabs hold of the pictures and breaths life into them. mouths now utter words, faces now bear expression, and movement suddenly carries intent.

"you remember that time when..."

you, in your eloquence, try to put your memory to words. you define it, you try to concretize it, buttressing your tale with many ancillary details. while in your attempts however, on this quiet act of rekindling, while revisiting what may have been cobwebbed stories and dusty, old dreams you realized...

"you know what? i missed you the most."

... there was reason why you held on.