a different kind of run

i'm still smiling from it all, how it was to wake up and have you at first sight. you looked so peaceful, so quiet, so still. it took a bit of my nervousness away. my anxiety left me for a moment there as i imbibed some of your calm. i got ready for my race, and so did you. despite how embarrassing it was that i felt i was inconveniencing you to tag along with my rituals before a run, and how early i had to start doing it (think 1am), you did not complain, you even insisted of coming along, and it made me feel so unworthy to have someone like you. but again, like all things negative that would surge up in me, the feeling did not remain, how could it when all feelings i get from you are all like this, lovely, pleasant, heart-warming. i did not say it then, maybe still feeling a bit shy to admit it, but i relished at the fact that i was sharing something new with you. i have ran many a race before, but none that has tested my endurance like this (and my-GAS, did it test me), and none where i had you. it tickled me... but i had to focus... it was kinda hard to do it though, i have say :)

the pre-race preparations did not prepare me for what came after, as i crossed the finish line, my legs cramping from pain, my torso stiff from spasms, my breathing impeded by the lactic acid drowning my muscles, as i collapsed by the side walk, all i could think about was looking for you... then i saw you, walking slowly towards me, and again, like hours before, all negative emotions left me. you were like anti-kyptonite (though superman, i will never be). you did not mind sitting next to me, your shirt, your pants, soaking in my sweat. you lifted my up, you asked me to lean on you as you walked me to my car. you were literally my staff, well, considering how HUGE i looked against you small frame, you did not complain. i tried to be strong but my body failed me. i was overcome by nausea, and i felt how you tried to lift me up. a smile crawled up my face. my heart was beaming with thankfulness.

the race was how i expected things to be, and then some. i knew i was not going to finish strong. i did not train for it, i was not prepared for it. but in my weakness, i guess, i was made to learn to draw strength from other people. marlon and angelo met me with beaming faces.... then there was you, who's mere presence flushed all my disappointment and pain away.

all races, i think, should finish like this. the medal they hung around my neck was nothing compared to the wreath that was your welcomed embrace. i love you very much.