what do you say? what do you do? when everything that should be perfect doesn't feel to be quite so? we're communicating. we're understanding. we're connecting and yet, despite all the good things, despite all the right things, the feeling doesn't feel like that at all.
a revelation of wants versus needs, that seems to be the lesson in all of this. though i enjoy how this new chapter in my life is unfolding, i cannot avoid but feel sometimes the fear it strikes in me as well. the fear of the unknown. the fear of having no control. the fear of failing. the fear of not being enough. the fear that this "disfeeling" i am having, could be the sign that what was given is now being taken away.
i want to work this out.
i want to be wise in handling this, just like how everyone should when handling the heart of another. i am just afraid, despite how i think i am wise... that in reality, i am actually foolish in thinking that i can handle this.